November 8, 2016 was a glorious day in history. We all basked in the glory of that evening as our candidate, Dr. Anthony Fauci, defeated Hillary Clinton to become the President of the United States.
Oh, hey, wait a minute… actually, none of us voted for the guy…
But, if you’re not having a good time right now with the US economy shut down – perhaps permanently in some states, you can thank the expertise of Dr. Fauci who is somehow setting America’s economic policy.
If you’ve never done a deep dive into Dr. Fauci, (who we have total respect for, by the way), then here goes. Fauci warned the world in the 1980s that AIDS was going to rampage through heterosexuals.
(Thanks for ruining prom for Generation X, jerk.)
In the early days of coronavirus, Fauci told us 11 million Americans would die. Then it quickly became 2.2 million, then a few hundred thousand and then, finally, eh… probably a bad flu season. He also told us we were too stupid to wear masks, and masks wouldn’t protect us anyway. But now we should totally wear masks. And shaking hands should be banned, but it’s okay to have sex with random strangers you meet on the internet.
He’s an expert. You must listen to him and respect him. Because reasons.
