There are things you expect from a United States senator. Voting on bills. Shaking hands with constituents they’ll forget in thirty seconds. Maybe even reading the bills they vote on — though that’s asking a lot.
What you don’t expect is a sitting senator logging onto X and begging millions of people to read a 10,000-word AI-generated blog post from someone called “Insurrection Barbie.”
And yet, here we are.
Ted Cruz Has a Reading Assignment for You
Texas Sen. Ted Cruz took to X on Sunday and shared a sprawling post titled “The Long Game and the Conservative Right,” complete with the kind of sub-headline that makes your eyes glaze over faster than a Krispy Kreme conveyor belt: “How a Network of Political Catholic Integralists, Russian Ideologues, and Media Provocateurs Are Systematically Dismantling the Evangelical Foundation of the American Right.”
That’s not a sub-headline. That’s a hostage note.
Cruz — or more likely, whichever staffer drew the short straw that morning — posted the link with an endorsement that would make a book publicist blush:
“READ every word of this. It’s the best & most comprehensive explanation of what we’re fighting.”
Every. Word. Of a 10,000-word AI slop post. On a Sunday. The Lord’s day. The day of rest. Ted Cruz looked at America relaxing on the couch and said, “Here, do homework.”
The AI Slop Problem
Now look, I’m not one to bash someone for sharing an article. We all do it. You see something interesting, you hit retweet, you move on with your life like a normal person. But there’s a difference between sharing a sharp column and endorsing what reads like ChatGPT had a fever dream about Catholic theology and conservative politics.
The piece was “written” — and I’m using those quotation marks like a shield — by user “Insurrection Barbie.” And here’s the kicker that tells you everything about the quality control on this masterpiece: the AI couldn’t even correctly identify the current pope. It’s Pope Leo. That’s not obscure trivia. That’s the guy in the big hat. If your 10,000-word theological treatise can’t get the pope’s name right, you don’t have an article — you have an expensive autocomplete disaster.
I gave it about thirty seconds of my life. Those were thirty seconds I could have spent doing something more productive, like watching paint dry or reading the instructions on a shampoo bottle. At least the shampoo instructions were written by a human being who understood what conditioner is.
The Texas-Sized Blind Spot
Here’s where it gets really fun. Texas has roughly 8.5 million Catholics — about 30% of the state’s population. Cruz’s adopted home turf. His voters. The people who pull the lever for him every six years. And he’s out here enthusiastically promoting a post that frames Catholic influence in American conservatism as some kind of shadowy infiltration operation.
I’m sure his staffers — the best and brightest minds that the great state of Texas has to offer — thought this one through. Probably a 4-D chess move. The kind of brilliant strategic thinking that also once led Cruz to fly to Cancún while his constituents’ pipes were freezing. Master tactician at work.
The Bigger Picture
The real sin here isn’t theological — it’s practical. We’re in an era where conservative leaders need to be sharper than ever. Trump proved that you win by being direct, punchy, and authentic. You don’t win by sharing AI-generated term papers that nobody — and I mean nobody — is going to read all the way through. Trump didn’t build a movement by posting dissertations. He built it by saying what people were already thinking in words they actually understood.
Cruz has done solid work in the Senate. He’s fought good fights. But recommending a 10,000-word AI slop piece to your followers isn’t fighting — it’s a cry for help disguised as intellectual engagement.
Who reads 10,000 words on X? Nobody. Not even the person who posted it. Probably especially not the person who posted it, because a person didn’t write it.
Senator, next time you want to rally the base, try something radical: use your own words. Keep it under 280 characters. And for the love of all things holy, at least make sure your source knows who the pope is.